Hi! My name is Callie and I am 22 years old. I started this blog because I have a passion for health, love, kindness, adventure, and spirituality. It’s a simple site with little tips I’ve learned from books, trial and error, and life. I tried really hard to be who I thought I was supposed to be and I wasn’t fulfilled. It wasn’t until I gave that up and just was myself that I found the happiness I had been searching so desperately for. You can’t expect to live your ideal life if you’re trying to be someone you’re not. So, just be yourself and everything will fall into place, I promise ❤
*(The health journey is first, my personal story is at the bottom!)
Since I can remember, I’ve had chronic migraines. When I was little my parents tried to figure out what was causing them by taking me to various specialists, getting an MRI, blood work, and anything else they could think of that would help. Sometimes the pain would be so bad I would faint or throw up and I’d spend the entire day in bed. When I was eight my mom took me to a chiropractor and it helped greatly, but wasn’t a permanent change.
I went to the chiropractor the years that followed and it definitely did help, but I still had a lot of headaches. I ended up taking a lot of Tylenol over the years and didn’t realize at the time that pain-killers aren’t good for you. Since I had been doing it for so long I didn’t even think twice about it.
At 21 I went to see an acupuncturist and she gave me some Chinese herbs and started needling me up. Her treatment was far too aggressive for my system and I would feel slightly sick after treatments, but it did help lighten the headaches immensely.
Then, at the beginning of summer last year (2016) I got horrible chronic nausea. I thought it was possibly an ulcer from the years of taking Tylenol so I stopped taking aspirin right away. I didn’t realize how many headaches I was getting because I popped a pill every time I felt one coming on but now that wasn’t an option. For three months I had terrible nausea that never left and migraines. I got another MRI, more tests done, was offered pills by the doctor for problems she wasn’t even sure I had, and nothing came up. I was scared and cried more days than I can count. My depression and anxiety were at their peak and I didn’t understand how I was supposed to handle that. I lost about a third of my hair from stress and whatever issue was causing the nausea. Although I felt somewhat hopeless, I had this odd feeling that all of this would be okay and something good would come from it. I prayed A LOT to the Universe, asked for help and surrendered.
Every time my head felt good I began researching everything that had to do with health. Before all of this happened my eating habits weren’t good and I was drinking every weekend. I decided I needed a big change and I did just that. I began having spinach shakes in the morning, cooking at home, and finding new plant-based recipes I wanted to try.
FINALLY, I got to the bottom of my chronic nausea. My chiropractor found out I had something called GERD and that my stomach had moved out of place. My esophagus had been bathing in stomach acid for at least three months. He said it only took 3-4 visits for most people to fix this issue, but mine was pretty severe. After each visit the nausea lightened a bit but I was getting frustrated at the slow progress. It took 6 more months for me to finally be nausea free and it was an amazing day when I realized I felt great for the first time in a long time.
I got nutrition testing done and found out a HUGE cause of my migraines was do to allergies. I was allergic to corn (which I ate nearly everyday… there is corn in everythinngggggg), bananas (which I had everyday in smoothies), wheat, eggs, oats, and rye. I cut out all of that from my diet and within a week I was feeling better than I ever had.
Even though the process (and post) were long, I am a billion times healthier and happier than I was at this time last year before the nausea started. I don’t binge drink anymore, or eat pizza at 3 am, I don’t go till 4 pm without eating and then eat a bowl of pasta and cookies. Instead, I drink amazing smoothies every morning filled with organic fruit, spinach/kale, vegan protein powder, and almond milk. I found a love of cooking/baking healthy and delicious foods, my hair is growing in thicker and shinier than it has ever before, and I’m so much happier than I was.
For most of my life, I felt like I was observing myself in situations, rather than living in the moment. I remember sitting in class my freshman year of high school and hearing all of the girls speak excitedly about Homecoming. I couldn’t careless, but I wondered what was wrong with me that I didn’t think like my peers. I didn’t really care about celebrities or changing my Facebook status to “in a relationship”. I thought more about the universe, wondered why we were all here, what it meant to be happy, how to feel fulfilled.
I constantly felt like there was a void in me that nobody else had. I felt like I was different than everyone else. I pretended like I was living in the moment and that I was happy, but I never felt like I was in the right place. I felt like there was something wrong with wanting to stay in on Friday night and read books like The Power of Now or listen to a Joe Rogan Podcast instead of getting shit faced every weekend. Even the music I liked was questioned by friends. Everyone I knew was listening to Katy Perry and Justin Bieber (no problem with that, I like pop too) but I also liked songs from Billy Idol, Jimi Hendrix, Cream, Elvis, Johnny Cash… I liked all music. But, for some reason that bothered certain people. They were annoyed they couldn’t put me in a box, and at the time I thought there was something wrong with me for that.
I don’t think we need to label the shit out of everyone and everything. I just want to enjoy what I enjoy, and not be worried if it fits in with the image of who people think I am. People aren’t one dimensional, it’s okay to have multiple passions, interests, and things you love. WHO CARES! Just do things that make you happy, and don’t let the ego or anyone else tell you there is something wrong with that.
Anyway– After high school I dabbled in spiritual books and meditation but still felt like I wasn’t “living life to the fullest”. I saw Instagram posts of people having crazy, alcohol fueled nights and I thought there was something seriously wrong with me for not doing that. I was 20 years old, so in our society that is what you do. So, in search for happiness, I tried to become the person I thought I was supposed to be.
I started bartending in the city, met a lot of new people, and started going out every weekend. On the outside, it looked like I was having a great time, but I couldn’t help feeling so fake. I was trying way to hard to find happiness and ended up just pushing it away. I did this for months, every weekend was the same, I was hung over A LOT, and I was more miserable than ever. My ego kept convincing me that the next weekend would be better, but they all were the same.
I want to make an important point that I don’t think there is anything wrong with going out and having a good time with friends. I have amazing memories of nights where I was drinking with friends, but the difference was I wasn’t in search of anything those nights. Some of the most fun nights I’ve had was when I was with friends I loved and we were just being ourselves and living in the moment. So, going out wasn’t the problem, it was my intention behind it. I was desperately searching for something to fill up the emptiness I felt, but nothing did it. I told the universe I knew I wasn’t in the right place, and that I didn’t have the willpower to stop, and if I wasn’t supposed to be drinking every night then I would have to be gently stopped.
3 weeks later I got alcohol poisoning… that didn’t stop me. I was drinking ten days after I felt better.
Then, I got horrible chronic nausea mixed with chronic migraines at the beginning of summer. Most days I couldn’t get out of bed. It lasted 3 months, and it was one of the best things that ever happened to me.
I didn’t have any energy left to try to be this person I thought I was supposed to be. I stopped going out, started reading about health and spirituality, and started to feel happier than I had in months. As cliché as it sounds, everything your searching for really is within you. It wasn’t in the boyfriend I thought I wanted, the shitty hangover food I ate, the extra shot, the new dress… you find it when you drop all of the crap from your life and just start being yourself. I fell in love with life because I fell in love with myself (grossly cliché, but true).
I dropped my unhealthy/shallow relationships, poor food habits, drinking habits, negative mental talk (if you ever start to watch how you speak to yourself you’ll be in shock. I was so mean to myself for so long! No wonder I wasn’t happy). And little by little I noticed magic start to happen in my life. My friendships deepened, I became healthier, happier, and a better person.
You’ll never find happiness by listening to the ego and others , who tell you who you should be. You are you. There is nothing more amazing than the freedom, happiness, and peace that come from being who you are fully.
I honestly feel weird writing all this out. I’m not sure why, but it just seems odd to write down some of the negative parts of yourself. But, if this helps anyone not feel weird or different, then it’s worth it.
I know this was long, but if you made it to this part of the post I want you to know that you are already on the right track to living your dream life. I am so in love with life and that’s what I want to share with you. I want you to be as happy as I am. Life is incredible. When you aren’t searching for things to fill you up and are happy with what you have, then good things start to come your way. I want to help you be the best version, healthiest, happiest of yourself. I hope you have an amazing day ❤
*The jacket in the photo is, of course, fake ❤